Notes from the Commissioners: Jo Higson, Devon and Cornwall Refugee Support

In our last Commission meeting we were discussing the issues that had been raised in the call for evidence and picking out the themes that came across and talking about where issues were joined or had impact on another issue. We came down to talking about kindness and what a difference it would make if everyone was just kind to the people they met; if neighbours were kind to one another, if we were all kind to the people we came across in the city centre or on the roads.

It reminded me of something that someone told me about an encounter they had that had made a difference to them. I will try and remember it as best I can as I didn’t record it when I was told the story, but the message really stuck with me:

“I was going through what was probably the most stressful time of my life – what do I mean probably? – I mean it was definitely the most stressful time of my life. I remember one day walking round in the city centre in a complete fug of unhappiness, close to tears and wondering whether it was really worth going on.

“A woman in front of me held the door open for me, despite the fact that it was awkward for her, and smiled and made eye contact and it changed my day. It was an acknowledgement that despite the stress, I was still a living breathing human being worthy of some kindness which connected me to the world. A world that wasn’t just full of injustice, pain and problems – but one with friendship, kindness and connection. In some ways, it saved my life.

“I wish I could thank that woman who unknowingly made my day bearable by her simple acts of kindness. But I can’t. My thanks is returning the favour and smiling at other people. You never know what a difference it might make to that one individual.”